Three and in – not just another football blog

As the news of Bébé slipping back out of the Old Trafford door with as little fuss as when he quietly slipped in, it begs the question; How has his transfer to Manchester United been so easily forgotten about? This was a player who was homeless a year or so before the signing, which is novel enough as a multi-million pound industry story. But on top of that, and here we may find the root of the answer we seek, his transfer to Manchester United had a distinctly ‘dodgy’ aroma to it.

The player was signed by Guimaraes for just half a packet of Rolos, then five weeks later, after a couple of pre-season games, they sold him to Manchester United for over £7m! Without Ferguson having ever seen him play! During the midst of a difficult financial period for Manchester United in which £7m wasn’t far off being their record transfer fee!

But why didn’t Manchester United, with their Portuguese scouting system and former assistant manager in charge of the Portuguese national team, just sign him for free a month earlier? Did he really make his mark during those pre-season friendlies?

But what’s this? Just before he completed this big-money transfer, he was suddenly poached from his existing agent by Portuguese ‘super agent’ Jorge Mendes, also responsible for the sales of Anderson, Ronaldo and Nani to Manchester United? A man who knows Alex Ferguson well? And he owned £30% of Bébé’s ‘economic rights’, so made about £3m out of the transfer for himself?

That sounds a bit suspicious. Has he ever been involved in Alex Ferguson paying over-the-odds for a Portuguese player before now then? What’s that? He handled negotiations directly with Alex Ferguson and Peter Kenyon for the sale of Ronaldo to Manchester United for £12.24m when Sporting had already accepted a bid from Arsenal for just £5.5m? An extra near-£7m? It sounds almost as if someone or other may have made the transfer happen purely for potential underhand personal financial gain.

As does this Bébé one.

Just like another Ferguson family member was once accused of doing on a BBC documentary. Which led to Ferguson blackmailing the BBC. Which he’s still doing. And coincidentally, no press agency is asking any questions about the potential for dodgy dealings behind this recent transfer.

Interesting…

Maybe it’s because I’m a soft Southerner, but I honestly can’t see what’s wrong with wearing a snood. When Samir Nasri & Co donned the tubular neck scarf for the first time, they can’t have imaged the reaction they’d provoke – partly because on the continent some footballers, like Gigi Buffon, have been wearing them for years.

Despite the insistence of certain managers, including Arsene Wenger, that the scarves actually provide a safeguard against injury, the old school of the British game have come out in force against them, with Alex Ferguson reportedly banning them from Old Trafford and claiming that “real men don’t wear snoods”.

That’s right, Fergie.  Real men, like Wayne Rooney, elbow people in the neck when they’re not looking and then run away.

Notts County manager, Ferguson acolyte, and self-proclaimed ‘Guvnor’ Paul Ince is the latest to speak out about snood-gate:

“Back in my time, and I sound old now, it was black and white boots and that was it.

Now you’ve got snoods, people wearing headphones when they are doing interviews, which I find disrespectful, pink boots, green boots, you name it they’ve got it, tights – they’ll be wearing skirts next.”

Terrible, isn’t it. The youth of today and their superfluous fashion accessories.

What Ince doesn’t say is that in his day, he himself was guilty of carrying about a superfluous accessory that was otherwise thought to be a brand new addition to the footballer’s kitbag: the air rifle.

Perhaps Ashley Cole should consider offering his snoodlessness at defence.  And hope against hope that Paul Ince is on the jury.

Pablo Aurrecochea is a Uruguayan goalkeeper. He is 29 years old, and currently plays for Paraguayan Primera Division side Guaraní.  All of this is fairly uninteresting, until you actually see the man in action.  Aurrecochea is the most flamboyantly dressed goalkeeper in football.

Over the years, he’s had some competition.  Goalkeepers are famously eccentric, and their idiosyncratic personalities have often been reflected in some truly bizarre kits.  England fans will remember David Seaman taking to the field in Euro 96, dressed as a gigantic packet of Refreshers:

As recently as this season, Edwin van der Sar has attempted to strike terror in to spheksophobic strikers (Google it) with this waspish number:

Frankly, their efforts are positively shoddy compared to Aurrecochea.  On the back of some advice from his wife (our sources are yet to confirm whether she is Trinny or Susannah), the Guarani goal-minder decided to introduce his passion for cartoons in to his colourful kits.  The results have been spectacular:

The funny thing is, Aurrecochea is also quite good. His side claimed the Paraguayan title last year, and he was named as the league’s best shot-stopper. That was not his finest achievement, however: on one glorious day last August, Aurrecochea responded to a signal in the night sky by donning the necessary garb to become ‘Bat-Goleiro’.

Premier League keepers: watch and learn.

I will not be satisfied until I see Petr Cech’s hat replaced with Thor’s winged helmet, Brad Friedel donning the Captain America attire, and Lukasz Fabianski take to the field in the iconic Iron Man suit.

In the meantime, I raise my mug of coffee to the utter mentalness of goalkeepers, South American football, and a man called Pablo who dresses as a superhero for work. And not just because he’s not allowed to see his kids.

我来自不远的未来，我知道很多人只会把我的话当是个玩笑，我愿意先给大家一点事实的证据。

我给出的的证据很简单，目前世界最关注的世界 杯，决赛双方将是荷兰和西班牙，荷兰2：1战胜了西班牙，斯内德和另一个你们猜不出的替补球员进了球。希望我的这番话不要在世界杯决赛前传到南非，否则我 担心球员心态受影响，从而改变了历史。

一个月后我会回来，那时候希望你们愿意相信我的所有关于未来的话！

Oh, yes, He’s Chinese.

For those of you who’s Chinese is a bit on the rusty side. Here is a rough approximation  in the Queen’s. The post was made on a Chinese website to which I have linked at the foot of this.

Clicking around the Net, this could be the most read post on an Internet forum ever. So even if it does turn out to be rubbish, it may yet make history.

I have given evidence of very simple, now the world’s attention the World Cup finals will be both the Netherlands and Spain, the Netherlands beat Spain 2-1, Sneijder and another you could not guess the substitute players into the ball.

I hope my words do not spread to South Africa before the World Cup finals, otherwise I fear that the mentality of the affected players, which changed history！

A month later I will come back, then I hope you all like to believe that my remarks about the future!

Prices for this 66/1 and better.

Look, you’ve been reading about a bloody Octopus called Paul, so don’t turn your nose up at a time traveller!

Link HERE

There have been some classics down the years but I think it’s going to take something really special to beat this cracker between Waterford United and Mervue United in the Irish Airtricity League.

This from the Get Out Of Town file, then.

The tale runs that a 2 year old octopus by the name of Paul is a football match outcome predicting machine. Or cephalopod if you want to get picky.

What happens is 2 jars are placed before Paul, each containing an indentical tasty tentacle treat.

Each jar is marked with a flag of the nations competing in the nominated match.

Tanja Munzig,  Paul’s aquarium boss says Paul the octopus not only chose a mussel from a jar with the German flag on it ahead of one in a similar jar bearing the cross of St George, prior to yesterday’s game, but he has a 70% success record.

So look out for men wielding live eels and goldfish in your local bookies.

The only thing we can gather from this clip is that Eboue is clearly fluent in Korean. Who knew? Seriously, who knew?!

It’s being reported that an Algerian player went bonkers after playing the USA.

After exiting the pitch, Algerian player Rafik Saifi spotted writer Asma Halimi, who works for Algerian newspaper Competition walked up to her and slapped her with his open hand in front of dozens of witnesses.

She hit him back, in the mouth and it’s suggested her nail caught his lip.

This prompted the player to then hurl a sports drink bottle at a wall in the interview area, as Halimi was ushered away by security staff.

The journalist plans to launch an official complaint with governing body FIFA and the Algerian FA. ”